Do you ever just
question it? Religion, your relationship with God, what you stand for, what
you are and who you actually are? To some people even the notion of such a
thought is an act of pure betrayal to themselves or in their mind betrayal to
God himself. I know this because I use to feel that way. Maybe it’s not the
same for everyone else. Maybe God isn’t looking at you through a magnifying glass
trying to determine what you are and how you think. Maybe you are allowed to
think outside the box of what you’ve been taught your whole life, which means
maybe he’s got thicker skin than any of us know. Maybe just maybe he’s bigger
than our minds eye all together. Maybe not. Think about your daily walk in
life. The perfect synergy you share with people that are around you, that also
share your ideologies, convictions and way of life. It all seems normal right?
But what about when your alone? Do you ever feel like a different person?
Someone that is screaming to be released in a different way. But it scares you
because it’s contrary to how those other people know you. I believe the second
we close our minds to the possibility that maybe our thinking is small, is the
moment we’ve become brain washed to man’s ideas and traditions. It’s the moment
that we’ve traded enlightened cosmic possibilities and ideas for thousand year
old traditions that only seem different due to man’s constant revision after
revision after revision. Is it betrayal to ask your God or your patterned
thinking if there’s more than what you know? I know we all think and pray that
already.. “show us more”… ”What else is there?”. I don’t know what your version
of that prayer or thought process looks like. But I’m sure one way or another
you’ve prayed, mumbled, hoped, thought or screamed it in some way. A simple cry
for beautiful revelation, the hope of pure originality. But what does this
powerful, divine God require of us to do? In order that he may “show his back
side” to the face of Moses on mount sini? Or what’s even more exciting to think
about is the idea that maybe he intended to show his face. But Moses lacked
something in his own personal belief and thinking that only allowed God’s back.
It’s just a simple example that came to mind.
Sometimes I think
about Buddhism, astrology, new age, Islam etc.. And I wonder to myself are all
the ideas and religions small pieces of a bigger picture. This God that we
speak of.. He’s huge right? We’ve heard it all of our life. “God is bigger than
your problems” some variation of this has been heard in your ears at some point
I’m sure. I think that maybe we’ve heard it to much. I think we’ve heard it so
much that the words used for him like huge and big have kind of lost there
depth and taste. Or maybe it’s just the fact that we’ve been using the wrong
words.. Words like big and huge are words I think of in correlation with my
stomach after I had just finished eating a Thanksgiving dinner. When I think
about the size and greatness of a creator that made the heavens and the earth I
usually go to the dictionary and try to find a word that I never heard of that
might touch on for a split second his enormity. Then it hits me. The word that
should be used is simply unfathomable. Lets face it. His greatness, strength,
height, all of it. It’s something that cannot be explained or understood. So
with that being said.. I’ve stopped trying to serve him and understand him.
BLASPHEMY! Haha Yes I know. Please don’t mess up the face. But honestly how can
you please a God that is unfathomable in everyway that he can be thought of? I’m
not saying that God is some rich girl in heaven that’s overly spoiled and
haughty. I’m saying that God has everything he needs, lets face it he’s God.
Maybe what he “needs” for a lack of better words is for us to simply delight in
ourselves. Nothing better than creating something that is impressed with itself
haha. For those of you that don’t believe in God, I’m sure you have something
like that already figured out. Because you don’t believe in a higher power of
any sort, man becomes that power. Which means you find your strengths, inspirations
etc in yourself. People that are engulfed
in religious activity and or Relationship with God find their identity in a
power that is greater than creation itself. They spend their life “crucifying
the flesh” that they might be closer to him. I believe in some of the core
values of atheism and believe in God. Some of you will probably write me off
for some of what I’ve said. Which is fine, It’s just an indication that your close minded, can’t
have a conversation and live in fear due to the chains of religion and old
traditions. But here is none the less where my mind has ended as of late. In
truth it’s only a fraction of things I’ve been thinking. But at the end of the
day it’s a fraction that I thought I’d share with you.
Happy Friday
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